Not sure why it took us so long to write a Pearl about transitions, as this seems like one of the key places that couples struggle. Moving from one place to another creates undue stress and tensions rise. When going on vacation there are skirmishes leaving the house, in the car on the way to the airport, etc. Why can’t things be done in a timely way? Each summer we spend a week in Maine and the last day is always unpleasant. Miraculously, after years of departure scenes, we finally decided that rather than wedge in one last day on the lake, we leave calmly, a day early and thus mosey home and even have a day to read mail, do laundry and prepare for the upcoming week. It is unpressured and almost pleasant. We have learned (hopefully, you do not have to wait until you are in your 70’s to gain this insight) that anticipating transitions and creating conscious strategies to plan your way through them, can lead to more pleasant experiences and fewer fights.

We appreciate thoughts and ideas for future Pearls from our readership, please submit them to us at marrylabs@comcast.net.