Lately we have been running into couples who are at each other’s throats but insist “we really do love each other.” Is how you treat your partner a true measure of loving them. Putting your partner down, tensions and mistrust in the relationship, threatening to move out, all undermine the important concept of commitment which is a cornerstone of a loving relationship. How do we understand this misalignment of love and how we treat each other? We are complicated beings! It behooves us to raise our consciousness to this conundrum, so that we can better align our feelings of love and our actions. We can be angry with someone, and yet be kinder. Sometimes easier said than done. Truly loving your partner involves empathy, compassion, having a positive attitude and honing skills of talking respectfully and listening without reacting. Don’t let bad habits and busy lives undermine love. Pause, reflect and take a breath. Loving someone may be a feeling, but to be effective, it involves having a caring attitude toward self and other.

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