January 2014 - Your Relationship in 2014 At Marriage Labs we speak about the importance of treating your relationship as a separate entity. This is to say that there is you, your partner, and the relationship, which like a child needs to be nurtured, fed, and cared for. Too often we put the relationship on the back burner and expect it to thrive. Sometimes we ask that you choose to do something “for the good of the relationship” putting your own more selfish needs aside. It is that time of year when people make New Year’s resolutions and these are often geared to self; losing weight, getting more exercise, trying to save rather than spend, etc. We ask that in addition to your personal resolutions, you consider sitting with your partner to address the relationship in the upcoming year. Where does the relationship fit in the list of priorities? What can you each do for the benefit of the relationship? Over the past month, we have been doing the following exercise with our groups: List two things that you could do to make your relationship better. List two things that your partner could do to improve the relationship. Write these down separately and then compare with your partner using a generous and kind attitude. Interestingly enough, universally people told us that it was easier to say how their partner could improve vs. themselves (what a surprise!). In 2014 please give your relationship the energy it deserves, and you will be repaid tenfold!

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